Self Portraiture and 3 recent Examples

How does one create a self portrait? 

Ive had various opportunities to create a few of my own but most of my ideas start with a few photos. I set up a "studio" wherever I can. In some cases it's been in my room using the directional lights on my ceiling fan to create shadows or highlight certain portions of my face. In other cases I've borrowed lights and played with those after rearranging my living room to fit all the lights tangled throughout the couches and tv stand. Once I get the lighting set up and decide how I'm going to position myself. I typically go for a straight faced look that doesn't portray much emotion because the goal in my self portraits is for one to guess who I am with the "thin slices" of information I give the viewer. In other cases I've put on music to set the mood in which I am trying to portray. I take a series of photos, sometimes up to 100 and even then I've gone back to take more after reviewing the photos on my computer. "I should have had my chin up more, If would have been pointing my face 10% more to the right I would have captured the light perfectly". These are the thoughts that go through my head as I review and wish I had two of me to cover these bases whilst taking the photos. Despite all of this, the editing process and really figuring out which photos tell "my story" is the fun part. I begin editing and as I edit my head is racing with back stories and real messages that portray me in the fullest. I can say that I haven't taken that "perfect self portrait" but in some ways I am glad. It shows me that I have more soul searching to do and gives me a drive to continue to find that perfect photograph.

With further adieu I give you my most recent works. 

"Mitch" by Justin Hawkes

10/23/15

Focal length: 22, F-Stop: 6.3, Exposure 1/200

Nikon D3000, Raw Photo

Edited in Photoshop CS6

The name is a combination of "Me and Glitch", it is also my middle name so it fits the self portrait theme.

The front man is a grey version of me with everything from the neck down being about 80% see through. It begs the questions of whether or not I portray myself in the fullest in front of others and if people allow them to see me in my entirety or just what they want. The various discolored and chopped up versions of myself seem to tier out of me. The different versions also tell their own story feeding into the same questions I stated above. One looks like an old photograph, maybe its a distant memory a long lost friend has of me. Another looks as if it is angry or evil in a way. I can only hope no one carries any such memory of me but who's to know. Others are blue and "cold" or calm. The different sections are all joined together by sharing pixels or pieces of one another so no matter which one of me you think you know, I have to face the reality that (good or bad) to you, it is indeed me. 

"Turn Around" by Justin Hawkes

10/23/15

Focal length: 22, F-Stop: 6.3, Exposure 1/80

Nikon D3000, Raw Photo

Edited in Photoshop CS6

A series of 16 photos beginning with me looking at the camera and turning around in little increments. This one was just plainly fun to make. It took a while but it made me research further into what photoshop could do and helped me broaden my horizon. The message could be about me having my own back, having eyes in the back of my head and covering my tracks. I typically tread lightly in most situations as to not excite curiosity when the message is clear or create confusion. Although I am the opposite with my art. I like to create confusion, confrontation, curiosity and controversy among other feelings when it comes to my pieces. So in this case I will not describe fully what I believe my message is but I will leave it up to the viewer.  

"Apart of Me" by Justin Hawkes

10/25/15

Both Photos: Focal Length: 30, F-Stop: 5.6, Exposure: 1/80

Nikon D3000, Raw Photo

Edited in Photoshop CS6

Two separate photos joined together in photoshop. One of me on the left and one of my son on the right. It took a lot of fine tuning but I think I got what I wanted out of it. It is last because it is my favorite of the 3 in this section. My son is "a part of me" and he is sometimes "apart from me". I feel as though he may not be in my presence he is still with me and I with him. I make sure to let him know that as often as possible and that no matter what we've got each others backs. I can see myself in his actions and reactions throughout his daily routines. I know how he feels and how to describe it before he does because, as I said before, he is me. I don't like to describe myself as the leader he is following, I think of myself as more of a guide. I will let him make as many decisions as he possibly can on his own and, although at times it leaves me biting my knuckles, I allow him to experience it and come to a consensus by himself whilst reminding him that I am "here" if he has any questions or would like any help. This is just a clipping within the full text of the connection my son and I share and I will leave it as this to give the viewer some room to think.